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  • took a quick run after work. not scenic, but it was nice to run through the city, weaving in and out of neighborhoods. 6.34 miles:

     

    yay for buying a new cell phone today though. i'm back to a nokia. the only bummer is that i lost all my photos i had taken with my old phone. boo. oh well... it feels good to have rid myself of that razr though- everyone seems to have one now.

  • pre-monday booooo.

    weekend: temperance hall, chloe for a minute, eastern market for eastern market day, grocery shopping, and then a lazy run/walk around the mall. five or so miles.



    mehak
    for dinner... and that sure hit the spot. i love good naan, and then
    some other stuff on the side to dip naan into. i could care less about
    the other dishes- chicken and something, lamb and something. and naan.
    mmm, mmm, good.

    i was thinking though, how cool it is to be in the presence of
    something great? you know that feeling? where you know you've just seen
    or met something or someone awesome. it probably sounds weird, but
    sometimes i really do feel that way about a pal of mine. he downplays
    everything he does now and what he's done in the past, but i see
    through it though and find myself amazed and impressed with him. you ask enough questions, and get at the heart of his work and his approach to it, and you realize that maybe it's humbleness or modesty. it's
    good to know good people. and i've asked him a few times now, why not go
    back and do more? knowing how good he was, how successful he was, what
    a difference he made- and knowing that success didn't follow his
    successors- doesn't he feel obligated? he says no every time, and that
    he's put his time in, so to speak... but i guess i just wonder how much
    potential is still in there that hasn't been tapped. couple the
    natural talent and inherent smarts with the wisdom he's gained over the years,
    and what are the possibilities for him? and then i begin to wonder how much is there in me? could i be doing something more, something greater?

    for some people, there's just something within that pushes them to do
    more, see how far they can take things. it's an internal drive, and
    when tapped into, great and awesome things happen. i've been saying
    that i want to run a marathon for example- and the reason is simply to
    see how far i can push myself. but beyond the physical, how much can i
    achieve elsewhere? how far can i push myself? perhaps it's hypocritical to be asking my pal why not do more when i haven't asked myself that very question. maybe it's time for me to see for myself how much more is possible... but then i remember how lazy i am, and how good it is to be complacent. i'm not sure how much i really care, and ignorance is kinda blissful.

    i'm not ready for monday. boo.

  • queasy.

    my sister asked me
    today how long will i keep on going out and being hungover on saturday
    and sunday mornings. good question... i'd say, at 30, that's about time
    to stop. or maybe 40, since that's the new 30. who knows. for now
    though, i'll keep on going.




    it was a miserable morning. i
    woke up early to go to the apple store for an appointment at the genius
    bar... but i was hungover with a headache. the metro ride was awful,
    shaking my head and stomach up a bit too much. and then to make matters
    worse, they diagnosed my ipod as having a busted hard drive. of course,
    my warranty is over, so it's replace it or send it to a 3rd party repair
    shop. booooo.

    despite the hangover however, i went and got a haircut
    after the appointment at apple, and then did some shopping... yay for
    spring and summer. new short-shorts, a dress for the sister's
    sister-in-law's wedding in AZ, and some earrings. even with a nasty headache and knot in my belly, i managed to get some good shopping in. nothing can stop me! hahahaha... but i did to cut the
    shopping trip short as i was starting to feel more and more
    queasy at the mall... and then riding home on the metro, i thought i
    was going to puke. i barely could hold myself together as i walked
    home, almost stopping on the sidewalk to put my head in a trashcan and throw up. it was nasty. i made it home though, and what a good regurgitation session does for the body! my stomach still is queasy but i'm snacking on saltines
    and sipping gatorade to aid the recovery.



    bad hangovers stink. but being noncommittal and having the luxury of laying around a saturday is maybe even better.

  • before i go to sleep...

    some random stuff before i go to sleep:


    -passive aggressive behavior drives me nuts. i'd love to think i'm
    never that- so call me on it if ever so. i'd really like to know.
    please have specific examples to share if it's ever the case.



    -two and a half cups of yuengling after kickball... and that was enough
    to get me buzzed. riding home on the metro buzzed is not a good
    feeling. and, i really don't like beer. yuengling- is that asian? and
    it must be just an east coast brand. never heard of it until moving
    here.



    -i was feeling really low during kickball today when i realized that i
    don't add very much value to the team. i should stop playing shortstop.
    we lost 20 to zero and it was pretty pitiful. they should really have a
    mercy rule. the funniest moment ever- one of our finance guys yells
    out, "hey man, we're stressed out. we're in the middle of an audit. cut
    us some slack." and it's true. this audit stinks. damn E&Y.



    -we should never have to prove our intellect. it should speak for itself.



    -i'm off to AZ for memorial day weekend. i still need to figure out my
    hotel situation though. i hope to get brown during my stay. i can't
    wait.



    -i must still have some growing to do. the thought crossed my mind that
    i may be so immature as to act out if i don't get my way, or things
    don't happen the way i'd like. sure, professionally, i can take it. but
    when it's personal, then i just don't know how to deal. the thing is
    though, it's never personal. hmmm. that's something to think about.



    -second time this week i've gone for drinks in lieu of running. that's not good.



    and, that's it.

  • seven miles and five guys.

    7.02 mile run after
    work. thank goodness for a later sunset and the ability to run in the evenings. my ipod died two blocks into my run
    though, and i think it's totally busted. but i still managed to get
    lost in my run and get some clear thinking in. i think (or, i hope) i
    feel a little better about some things and can stop being so obsessive
    and nutty.

    anyhow, i think i might be the most dysfunctional runner
    ever- i stopped at five guys
    on the tail end of my run and grabbed some "dinner." i'm sure i looked
    pitiful walking home in my running gear, sweaty from the workout... and a grease-stained paper bag in one hand, soda
    in the other... but it was delicious! here was the run:

  • a revised rambling.

    i had every intention of going for a run yesterday evening, but i found
    myself at happy hour after work.
    rocket bar. not the classiest place
    ever, but a nice after work escape. i just felt like after a day of
    getting very little work done because of a wandering mind, i needed to
    unwind and try to refocus on other things. i was distracted all day,
    probably because i have been over thinking an issue... and now, here we
    go with it.



    so, my sister says that this situation is a little different from the
    others and therefore, i should tread carefully. no sudden movements!
    and i agree with her, completely. whereas i'm normally not so
    conservative in matters of this nature- okay, sometimes i'm reckless- i don't know if this is another one of those blips on my
    radar screen that surfaces every so often (or every week, it sometimes
    seems). and as a result, i don't know what i'm supposed to do about it or how i'm to respond
    accordingly.


    there are the obvious differences- like our histories and
    attitudes and beliefs. and then there are other differences- like i the fact that i don't feel like i'm in control of this situation because i have never dealt with someone of the like. and then
    there are internal factors, meaning this is different because of how i feel about it all. there's the fact that i care all of a
    sudden how i'm seen or perceived and hopefully, that i'm not judged.
    and then there are the little things- like the flutters, and amazingly,
    nervousness. i haven't felt
    that in quite a while. it's all quite different and all told, i'm just not in
    familiar territory. this is not water i've ever treaded before- so
    i really don't know what my next move should be. typical fashion would
    be for me to be fortunate in having what i want happen, or, that i put out there what i want, make it happen, and then dive right in and try to
    stay afloat. but like my sister said, this situation is different and
    may call for a different approach. and just maybe, this is a situation beyond my control.


    just
    go with the flow, let things be organic... yadda, yadda, yadda... i'd
    really love to do that. but, sometimes, you just want to know where you
    stand. is it, or isn't it? is it one sided or reciprocal? not knowing
    is not fun, and i think that, along with this strange and somewhat
    foreign version of
    restraint, is what is driving me crazy right now. yet for some reason,
    i'm not brave enough to just say what i think, and ask questions. maybe
    it's because i don't want to ruin the good thing it is, just as is.
    maybe it's because part of me wants to explore how and if the
    differences could really mesh but is scared to find out that it just
    won't. i don't know. but, i can't help but to think that if you risk
    nothing, you gain
    nothing.



    does any of this make sense? what to do, what to do...

  • go wiz.

    farewell, wizards. thanks for welcoming and having me as a fan, despite me being new to DC and all. i appreciate the good times you have provided. tonight's game was bittersweet; my first NBA playoff game! i thought you had a chance to win it too, even with your star player injured. it really seemed like it was possible, a game five... especially with jamison going for 31 points. but in the end, the cavs and lebron just got ya. i enjoyed myself though, and every minute of the game was thrilling... so i do thank you for that. see ya next season.

    oh yah, PS, unrelated, but i'm diggin' amy winehouse lately. rehab is just the tip of the iceberg with her. the other stuff is much, much better. wake up alone, i keep playing it on repeat... there's something about it. i like it, a lot.

  • funny pics over on my sister/nephew's blog. here's a snapshot:

  • transparency.

    i love eye candy. i'm a sucker for a good looking fella. i can admit
    it. but, the lesson i've learned as a single gal is that good looks
    don't always amount to chemistry, and physical attraction doesn't
    always mean you will or should date the person. you can try to make it
    happen, but you just can't force chemistry. some people are just there
    for you to ogle, and others are there for you to cultivate
    relationships with. deciphering between the two scenarios is sometimes
    difficult, but once you've figured it out, it's best to be honest about
    it all, despite the sting you may feel, or cause. and in the end, being
    transparent is always best. wouldn't you agree?

  • weekend recap.

    friday night was oya for dinner and then wonderland later in the night. i had too much fun at wonderland, and probably too much fun afterwards too... i don't think i went to bed until past four a.m. which meant that on saturday, i practically slept until 3pm or so. i was in and out of sleep from 10:30am until late afternoon... and despite being hungry, the rest was wonderful. i finally got some dinner around 5pm, woomi garden in wheaton, and that was delicious. i kept it low key for the rest of the evening, watching the namesake and then coming home for rest. the namesake was beautiful- i loved it. a sweet story in which i cried at multiple points... and now i want to go to india to see the taj mahal- just to have my breath taken away by the amazing demonstration of love it is.

    today has been a suburban day... arties for lunch. then klines for some soft serve. and then some good 'ole family time putzing around fairfax and m. park. earlier in the day though, it was the strangest thing- my sister made a joke and i had this visceral reaction to it- a completely subconscious reaction- i flipped her off! i couldn't believe it! and neither could she. oops, my bad.

    that's it. nothing compelling to say or write. still.